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THE THRILL OF RATINGS AND THE AGONY OF GRIDLOCK

May 21st, 2010 by polarity1

by Polar Levine for polarity1.com  March 17, 2010

Lose your job? Can’t afford necessary health care? Kids flunking out of school? Your pursuit of happiness finding no suitors? One could be excused for being depressed and/or pissed off. A year ago it seemed sure that the Dems would turn things around and prevent the imminent Decline of the American Empire. But the Republicans have figured out that in the Senate, 41 is the majority. Even after the catastrophic W years they’re surging. And it should be no surprise. They learned that depression drains energy while anger, fear and loathing crank up the adrenaline. Legions of sad-sack aging white folks are useless to the Right. Too lethargic to fight for god’s favorite nation, they might be vulnerable to actual information and start voting for their own interests. And we all know how those egghead liberals love to explain things. But on the heels of the Sixties New Left, the Right knows that the political honey spot is fear and hate. It feels good to be pissed and know exactly whom you’re pissed at. It’s an amphetamine rush, an aphrodisiac.

If political propaganda warfare were simply grist for sports chat, it would be dumb but harmless. But the success of the strategy has given Senate Republicans the backbone to shut the government down in the middle of an economic crisis and two wars. Though the media profits by presenting politics as sports, it doesn’t do the country any good when the debate revolves around Obama’s alleged commitment to communism, health care reform’s goal of exterminating everybody’s grandparents, refuting climate change with no sense that weather (particularly local weather conditions) and climate are two different things, or the claim there were no terrorist attacks during the W administration.

Recent polls concerning support for the Tea Party movement indicate that the vast majority of those polled know nothing or too little about the movement to have an opinion. That suggests a year of willful and/or time-crunched ignorance on the part of two-thirds of the American electorate. When that majority starts to get curious about what’s going on in the world, what kind of information will it respond to — an elegant and nuanced exposition of complex proposals for much needed reform, or dire warnings of fascist dictatorship with enraged calls to arms?

It’s pretty scary when a society, arguably the most powerful and influential in the world, lacks the historical, social, international and political awareness required to make informed electoral decisions. And we have a corporate media machine that has figured out that its news broadcasts will lure more advertising dollars if modeled on sitcoms and dramas: cute anchors with peppy chatter, focus on news that can be accompanied by dramatic video — violence, tears, scandals followed by Apology As Media Event, and political punditry that favors the most videogenically combative infotainer.

News was always a loss-leader for the TV networks until Roone Arledge took charge of news programming for ABC in the Seventies. After his masterful work in ABC’s sports programming, he knew the value of its popular “Wide World of Sports” tagline, “the thrill of victory! and the agony of defeat!” With that ratings-winner aesthetic in mind, he moved news into the entertainment department — and 40 years later, news as an entertainment medium is now the norm. The best political theater to be had is on Fox News — by far the most viewed “news” programming on TV. There’s one area where America still maintains Number One status in the world — entertaining itself. And Fox News knows how to entertain. If not for its flair for cynical irony, it would adopt ABC’s “Wild World of Sports” tagline in place of its own “fair and balanced.” Its narrative could easily be mistaken for The Onion: the health care bill features death panels set up to execute your beloved grandma. Barack Obama, a Muslim native of Kenya, is devoted to enslaving Americans in a Socialist dictatorship that will bring an end to Social Security, Medicare and unemployment benefits — only to deplete our national treasury on big government entitlements. Its world view also looks approvingly on corporate welfare, the war on drugs and marginalizing gays — as though these were not as much the hallmarks of “Big Government” as taxes and regulation. This is the news that Fox News delivers and that forms the political knowledge base of many millions of our people.

For this we can thank the most dangerous man in America — who has done more harm to American society than any terrorist could. A foreigner who feels no allegiance to this nation. Who came over here, paid off legislators to skirt a fundamental rule that prevents the monopolization of information media. Who has turned the media into a wedge that pits one half of the nation against the other half to increase his profits. If raising the level of awareness and the quality of our political process was a ratings winner, Rupert Murdoch would have created Fox News to do just that. CNN made cable a place where serious, in-depth, world-wide news reporting was possible. Murdoch turned cable into the Circus Maximus.

MSNBC, the perennial last place cable news outlet, finally found its niche as the lefty answer to Fox. Its two stars, Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow, represent the station’s dilemma. Olbermann has presented infrequent but brilliant commentary and Maddow has outed the right wing Christian cult, the Family, and its involvement with Uganda’s proposed draconian anti-gay legislation. She has been an invaluable resource for exposing the fraud behind congressional Republican vaudeville. These broadcasts, however, have increasingly taken on the smirking and combative flavor of the Fox crew. A fitting tagline for Olbermann’s and Maddow’s broadcasts would be, “We’ll tell you everything those right wing assholes just said.” So Fox, Limbaugh, the Family and the teabaggers provide the content for MSNBC which only confirms that idiocy as legitimate political discourse. Rarely is a Dem narrative THE STORY. Virtually the entirety of Olbermann’s and Maddow’s broadcasts are devoted to fact-checking the Republican/teaparty narrative with on the one hand, expressions of horror over intentional disinformation and hypocrisy and, on the other, hubristic chuckling over the anticipated embarrassment the perps will face when their constituencies find out the truth. Of course there will be no such embarrassment because the media venues that these people speak through seem uninterested in correcting the record. Maddow makes more sense when she suggests that the serious press should be embarrassed by its default of purpose. By presenting the right as laughably clueless, Olbermann and Maddow are less likely to stir their audiences than Fox which amps its viewers with a steady diet of fear and loathing. While the Left chuckles, the Republicans, who wisely kept W and Cheney out of the 2008 convention hall, give Cheney a standing ovation at the recent CPAC convention. Something serious is going on out there and the Left thinks it’s a sitcom.

Olbermann is far more persuasive when he deliveries his “Comments” than when he mugs and mimics. His arguments for serious health care reform, as personified by the struggles of his ailing father, are the most elegant and persuasive works of journalism I’ve ever encountered. But that stands in contrast to other recent commentary that has trended toward self-parody and invited a hilarious impersonation by John Stewart. Maddow also loses her credibility by devoting ever more time to excruciating attempts at humor. MSNBC has committed its brand to the only strategy now possible for survival on cable info programming — partisan advocacy of the Left to compete with Fox’s advocacy of the Right. CNN clings to an increasingly passive version of objectivity and its ratings are sinking for its trouble. On network TV PBS still does actual news. Did you know that? Oh yeah, and there are the networks. And a couple of newpapers.

MSNBC has found its direction but hasn’t found a Roger Ailes to create a unified delivery system that would direct its two stars either to use their impressive journalistic skills full force or join the food fight and sling a messier glop than the competition. Ailes, so far, has chosen the winning format — get viewers as emotionally amped as possible and direct it toward easily identifiable bad guys. This requires a tightly coordinated narrative that avoids the complexity that might be caused by fair or balanced reporting. Actual professional level reportage would diffuse the element of cataclysmic menace that defines the Fox News brand. Fox is so unconcerned about its lack of credibility as a journalistic enterprise that it goes as far as to actively promote a political movement — the teabaggers — and still pantomimes its sincere commitment to its “Fair and Balanced” tagline. Not since Paul’s campaign to brand Jesus has there been a more spectacularly successful propaganda machine.

What the Left doesn’t get is that right wing infotainers and legislators will not face embarrassment when the truth comes out because their constituencies don’t watch MSNBC or read actual newspapers. Lefties are so earnest that they don’t get that the Right simply lobs the ball over whatever remains of a serious press. I’m sure the Righties know that their disinformation is bullshit and are aware of all the incriminating video footage. But they know that the narrative sticks to the wall and that the Left will spend its resources setting the record straight instead of creating its own narrative.

The only voices of the Left that have any influence are John Stewart, Steven Colbert, Bill Maher and the pre-senatorially denatured Al Franken. That’s because they know what their occupation is and their audiences know it too. They deliver informed political points of view (not without bias), but the info is never delivered without some reference to the oddness of finding themselves in front of TV cameras talking about the news of the day. Their references to their self-consciousness (in or out of character) are, knowingly, an additional layer of information. Unlike Olbermann’s and Maddow’s lame attempts at schtick — these guys are funny.

Beck, Hannity and O’Reilly and their regular stable of guests also know they are not “journalists.” They know they’re entertainers who are skilled at making people scared and angry. Like explosions in blockbuster movies, fear and loathing form the gold standard of right wing infotainment. The Fox crew delivers a coordinated narrative. Each has developed his own character to act it out. Beck has become the most influential of the three, despite his transparently bad acting, because he is the most media-savvy. When he came over to Fox he very consciously took on a persona based on the Howard Beale character in the film, “Network.” Like Beale, Beck is driven to tears by the sad state of current affairs and he wants you to scream that you aren’t gonna take it any more. Beck is the feminine counterpart to O’Reilly’s angry blue collar white guy and Hannity’s smug, father-knows-best certainty. Like Barbara Walters and reality show producers, Beck knows that viewers love to see weeping on camera. Unlike Stewart and Colbert, Fox’s vaudevillians can thrive only as long as they don’t wink. I have to assume that the three morning lightweights are supposed to be the taunting high school in-crowd while Greta Van Susteren is the “serious” one. . .even when she’s on camera fawning over Sarah Palin.

The unbridgeable gridlock that now defines the American political system is the only possible outcome when the daily flow of information of huge national and international consequence is niche-marketed like pop music and hair styles. It seems more certain every day that the 2008 Democratic electoral sweep was the result of the catastrophic failure of George W Bush rather than the ability of the Dems to make a compelling case for themselves. It’s odd that they’ve been so far ahead of the media curve online but so far behind the curve on TV. Congressmen Alan Grayson, Barney Frank and Andrew Weiner get it. Grayson cribs off the Frank Luntz playbook — attaching “death” to all the right nouns. Frank and Weiner mouth off with gusto, and Weiner’s loud, grating voice rattles TV’s speakers as well as it gets under the skin of conservatives. Unless the bulbous mass of ambivalence that congressional Dems have become gets a super-majority of Andrew Weiner clones, we can expect a one-term Obama administration. And it will boast of spearheading bold placebos of incremental micro-change in the face of multiple crises that foreshadow the historic end of American prosperity. But maybe we’re too hard on them. In the Age of Murdoch, if the Left can’t deliver its message with the crystal-meth depravity that the Right has mastered, we can expect Glenn Beck to write the first draft of 21st Century America’s history.

In November 2012, the day Scott Brown gets elected president, the majority of young voters who made Obama’s election possible will be nowhere near the voting booths. They already discovered that it’s all nothing but a reality show.

ME SO HORNY FOR CSPAN GIRL

May 21st, 2010 by polarity1

by Polar Levine for polarity1.com April 1, 2010

During the 2008 presidential campaign Rich Lowry swooned over Sarah Palin in the conservative National Review (“Hey, I think she just winked at me.”). The guy came off like a masturbatory teenager. Not because it’s impossible for a politician to have prurient appeal to an adult intellectual. It was the stuff that got him off — that standard issue babe come-on. Such conservative fantasies. But I get the general premise.

I experienced my own current events hard-on while watching Charlie Rose a few weeks ago. My wife and I have been Charlie fans for years. We love watching him in the throes of verbal paralysis whenever he’s interviewing artist types, so intense is his sense of wonder about the “creative process.” And his oddly huggable attempts to bathe in the glow of a guest’s deftly delivered punch line by repeating the joke minus the funny stuff. He’s an astoundingly decent guy who attracts the best and brightest. I especially love the Marathon of Jews aspect of his shows — so few us left on Earth but so many worthy of a seat at Charlie’s table: authors, scientists, medical researchers, musicians, architects, political pundits and Noted Authorities of every kind. And that provides me the opportunity many nights each week to pause the digi-cable box, turn to my shiksa wife and bellow, “You see!!! And look at what your people did to the Jews!!!” But when Charlie had Elizabeth Warren on I got my own current events hard-on.

I testify to you, dear readers — the moment was delicious. As the Charlie lite-jazz-funk theme faded out she appeared: a casually tidy blonde, bespectacled, perky Boomerette — a shiksa no less — who looks every bit the inhabitant of her career path — Obama Administration bureaucrat, academic, and bankruptcy lawyer. And, yet…  pretty in a bureaucratic kind of way. She’s currently overseeing the TARP bailout of Wall Street. Finally somebody is providing oversight about something. That in itself can engorge some American genitalia.

I’ve found her regularly to be loveable (platonically) in mini-interviews with John Stewart, Bill Maher, Keith Olbermann, etc. But Charlie gave her lots of time to ooze into something more comfortable — her Liz-ness. She initiated the foreplay by outlining the current Great Recession — how we got there, how everything is being done (and not done) to make sure we stay there and go back there again and again, and the cast of characters who made and continue to make it all happen. She was stunningly accurate. But this was not the equally accurate but burpy repartee of a Paul Krugman or Joseph Stiglitz. Liz croons it like Julie London (look it up) — she’s pure sex. Her lips seem to ripen. Her voice is warm and sweet, but also frankly straight to the point. With amazing clarity she tells you exactly what she wants and why and where. Her explication of complex and ethereal financial exotica is so right and also witty, so personally and palpably felt that it feels like she’s talking dirty to me. When she speaks of how real people are affected by the gluttony on Wall Street, K Street and in the halls of Congress you can see real passion in her eyes. Her body opens and relaxes as she leans forward toward me — well… toward Charlie… but she knows it’s actually me. Clearly she knows I’m a sucker for a pretty female (and subtle prettiness is the most seditious kind) who is funny, smart and passionate about useful things.

But when I cool off and return to Earth, I’m a happily married family man and I sort of accidentally noticed that the TARP overseer had a wedding band on. OK. I can’t have Penelope Cruz either. But please — if I can’t have Elizabeth Warren slowly removing her Overseer uniform as she tickles my ear hairs with gentle cooing about the need for a stand-alone consumer regulatory board — at least get rid of Tim Geithner and Larry Summers and make her Treasury Secretary. I swear the world will be a more prosperous and sexy place.

Audioplasm (Polarity/1 & Rubio) – Guillermo Ate My Lunch

October 19th, 2009 by polarity1

“Guillermo Ate My Lunch” is the opening track of Audioplasm’s first CD, Heavy Meadow, which features Guillermo Cardenas on merengue percussion. Audioplasm is a collaboration of two artists from New York
City, Polarity/1 and Rubio. Together they have already scored the soundtrack for the documentary “In Debt We Trust” by Danny Schechter. Polarity/1 himself wrote the music for the award-winning Schechter’s WMD (Weapon of Mass Deception). This video, directed by Marc Wagnon & Polarity/1, shows their ability in visual arts as well as their musical eclecticism.
http://www.polarity1.com/audioplasm/index.php
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Free electro MP3 from Polarity/1: ‘Bring On The Sudz’

May 4th, 2009 by polarity1
Get this player from Fairtilizer!

Polarity/1 – “Bring On The Sudz” (Speechless)
Download Free MP3 | Take a Listen

“With his minimal sound in a complex format, Polarity/1 gives you a huge musical massage. Notes seem to rise out from a basket of fresh fruit and everywhere you can ’see’ these mystical exotic sounds. While the first part of ‘Bring On The Sudz’ is a funky house disco inferno, a saxophone suddenly brings you back to the roots moving to an acid jazz feel. Towards the middle, the song performs jungle-type beats with animated saxophone solos giving the feeling that a new direction is afoot. After 30 seconds of this, it’s back on track in ‘pithecanthropus’ style. Polarity/1 then brings more change, providing listening clarity to a fusion of musical styles. ‘Bring On The Sudz’ finishes with it’s acid jazz signature. Polarity/1 forges his song like a clay sculpture. Orchestrating centrifugal instrumental forces. Absolutely genius.” – Nicholas Guida

The album SPEECHLESS by Polarity/1 changes the colors of the room. Things happen. Cheesy cultural artifacts sprinkled on sarcastic spaghetti. Mood music for non-linear equations and unlikely postures. Doesn’t require drug-ingestion… IS drug ingestion. The grooves moves and the sex is textural. Beat science for curved dancefloor.
http://www.itunes.com/polarity1/speechless

The music of NYC-based POLARITY/1 is exactly what the name suggests: conjoined opposites — a mash up of new: cutting edge electronica/hip hop/nu-jazz and old; roots music of America (blues, funk, country, early jazz), Brazil (samba, pagoda, etc.) and West African groove science.
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Polarity1/9214821180

Koko Dozo Graces Mel’s World At Le Royale

April 7th, 2009 by polarity1

Koko Dozo Graces Mel’s World At Le Royale

New York’s Post-Pop duo Koko Dozo (Polarity/1 & Amy Douglas) will be bringing their unique version of ‘Global Funktronica’ to Mel’s World At Le Royale on Thursday April 16th at 10:00 PM. Koko Dozo will perform for the gorgeous, lovely and talented Mel Merio who is having one of her fab soirees at the hip NY venue. With an interior that brings to mind “Rock & Roll meets Avant-Garde,” Le Royale is a place where the smart crowd goes to hear cutting edge music and meet other people with culture.

MEL’S WORLD AT LE ROYALE
Live performance by KOKO DOZO
Thursday April 16th – 10:00 PM
Le Royale
21 7th Avenue South, New York
212.463.0700
http://leroyaleclub.com/

Watch Koko Dozo’s January 24, 2009, performace at NY’s Tubway

“Holy poop, B-52’s reincarnated. Nevermind that they’re still around. This thing I’m used to hear in early 90’s to some intro to some crazy tv-show. How do you start making this kind of music? Seriously! Funk, boogie, soul, electro, space-thingy.” Danger! Danger!

“New Yorkers looking for music that embraces their city’s cultural diversity ought to check them out. The best way to survive in a melting pot is to get close.” Gasper Oliviera, GBH.tv

Koko Dozo is a duo of legally alienated New Yorkers — Polarity/1 and Amy Douglas — who create a sound they call Global Funktronica: a unique blend of electronica, funk, club grooves, jazz and roots grooves from Brazil, Latin America and Africa. Their lyrics are hilarious, provocative, and powerful, sung in English, Spanish and Portuguese, supported by music that is truly otherworldly, rich, textural and extremely funky.

http://www.kokodozo.com
http://www.myspace.com/kokodozo

Koko Dozo – New Videos

March 20th, 2009 by polarity1

 

Boomchi (Tubway, NYC)

 

On January 24, 2009, post-pop duo Koko Dozo (Polarity/1 & Amy Douglas) brought their unique blend 

of funk/disco/dance music to Tubway in New York City. www.kokodozo.com

 

Koko Dozo’s performance of “Boomchi” has a strong disco vibe and it is the perfect fit for the 

Tubway stage. Amy is on fire here with some really powerful singing (in Spanish, no less). 

A quick glimpse of the crowd shows that they are having a great time as well.

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Spaceman (Tubway, NYC)
On January 24, 2009, post-pop duo Koko Dozo (Polarity/1 & Amy Douglas) brought their unique blend 
of funk/disco/dance music to Tubway in New York City. www.kokodozo.com
“Spaceman” is more of that familiar post-pop funk that Koko Dozo does so well. In this live 
performance, Polarity/1 is rocking the guitar while Amy sings her heart out. The song has a bit 
of an otherworldly vibe at times, but it is without a doubt another great jam for the party at Tubway. 
One thing is clear from watching both videos – Koko Dozo have a definite stage presence and know 
how to work a crowd!
YouTube Preview Image

 

NACOTHEQUE: NYC Holiday Fiesta With Koko Dozo

February 25th, 2009 by polarity1

New York’s Post-Pop duo Koko Dozo will be bringing their unique version of ‘Global Funktronica’ to ‘Nacotheque: NYC Holiday Fiesta,’ being held at Fontana’s on Saturday, February 28th. Nominated by PAPER magazine “Best New Party of 2007″ and dubbed as “NYC’s hottest indie rock party en español” by URB magazine, Nacotheque has become one of the most unique events in New York City’s underground scene.

NACOTHEQUE: NYC Holiday Fiesta
Live performance by KOKO DOZO
Saturday February 28, 11:00 PM
Fontana’s
105 Eldridge Street, New York
(212) 334-6740
http://www.fontanasnyc.com

“Holy poop, B-52’s reincarnated. Nevermind that they’re still around. This thing I’m used to hear in early 90’s to some intro to some crazy tv-show. How do you start making this kind of music? Seriously! Funk, boogie, soul, electro, space-thingy.” Danger! Danger!

“New Yorkers looking for music that embraces their city’s cultural diversity ought to check them out. The best way to survive in a melting pot is to get close.” Gasper Oliviera, GBH.tv

Koko Dozo is a duo of legally alienated New Yorkers — Polarity/1 and Amy Douglas — who create a sound they call Global Funktronica: a unique blend of electronica, funk, club grooves, jazz and roots grooves from Brazil, Latin America and Africa. Their lyrics are hilarious, provocative, and powerful, sung in English, Spanish and Portuguese, supported by music that is truly otherworldly, rich, textural and extremely funky.
http://www.kokodozo.com
http://www.myspace.com/kokodozo

Space Alien Nation – Issue #8; February 2009

February 25th, 2009 by polarity1

FUNKY NORPSE CHICKEN AND ZUZZ BANNED BY THE MUMULO HABJABOR!

Exalted Leader Demands As Tribute – Portion Of Koko Dozo’s Music Sales On Planet Earth. Violent Protests Break Out Throughout the Velfin Spoidioyz.

Our exalted blessed leader, THE MUMULO HABJABOR has ordered that dancing the funky norpse chicken is to be banned throughout the Velfin Spoidioyz. In his wisdom, he gave no reason for the ban which has led some in the extreme radical press to wonder if the timing of the ban — coinciding with the announcement of a royal share in Koko Dozo’s revenues — suggests an element of envy in the royal court of the intergalactic popularity of our esteemed noizmakers whose discovery of Earth last year has captivated our galaxy. Naturally, we at Space Alien Nation in no way agree with those nuttering naboobs of negativism who were rightfully arrested last night and remain encased in oozing sacs of their own bulf.

As for our immaculately infallible leader, The Exalted Blessed Mumulo Habjabor’s reasonable claim on a trifling portion of Koko Dozo’s noiz revenue — surely a mere 86% of Earth sales (95% of sales outside Earth’s atmosphere) — is beyond question. And naturally, the Royal Dulumthay should own the master recordings and half of the publishing rights, not to mention reimbursement from Koko Dozo for all manufacturing costs and promotional copies of noiz distributed. The celestial agonies endured by our gentle heroic leader, The Mumulo Habjabor, on behalf of the citizens of the Velfin Spoidioyz have earned the All-Knowing One that small tribute by those who are permitted to breath the gases of fame. We say “Goolyoops!” six or seven times in tribute to The Exalted One. Our feelings about the banning of the funky norpse chicken are highly complex and difficult to express at this time. But we certainly frown upon the violent and disrespectful way many of the citizens of the Velfin Spoidioyz have reacted to our Blessed Leader’s decree. Law and order must prevail. We all know that we have a legitimate avenue to express disfavor with a royal decree — we only need deliver a written statement that includes one’s name, place of residence and official ID number.

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Fear Grips Populace That Violent Protest Demonstrations Against The Exalted Blessed Mumulo Habjabor’s Latest Decree Might Draw Entire Velfin Spoidioyz Into Chaos

Total anarchy in Oodioon threatens to create a war zone unless order is maintained. Unruly mob (Left) has created a situation where citizens leave their homes at their own peril. Radicals have been disguising themselves as earthforms. The Mumulo Habjabor blames the popularity of Zuzz and the funky norpse chicken for “the rejection of traditional Velfin values.”

Reknowned Hero Arrested. Charges Have Not Been Officially Announced

Moomuns Wobjimmie has been arrested on the orders of The Exalted Blessed Mumulo Habjabor. Though charges have not been made public, the beloved hero is thought to have recently harbored hopes and dreams of a personal nature. That such a highly respected personage would place the entire Velfin Spoidioyz in mortal danger is likely to result in continued unrest.

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A SPECIAL MESSAGE FROM OUR EXALTED BLESSED LEADER — THE MUMULO HABJABOR

I feel that it is my sacred duty to take the time to address all citizens of the Velfin Spoidioyz. As it is I’ve had no sleep in ages; such is the degree to which I toil for you. Toxic thubulous noxons threaten the health of the inhabitants of Oobrose Kulk? Volcanic eruptions on Looliuhf? An outbreak of gagulous mulm? Don’t worry. The Mumulo Habjabor will fix it. And for what? I ask you. I break my nemp to serve you.

Do I deserve to powder my beak a little with the riches I’ve allowed those two Koko Dozo snots to make? No. That would be a disgrace.

A number of citizens have protested my recent decision to ban the funky norpse chicken. Sacred artifacts have been destroyed and members of our brave security forces have been injured. So this is how you choose to behave? Fine. Go right ahead. Suit yourself. Are you satisfied now? A fine thing. I hope it has made you happy. Real smart. You think this is funny? It’s no laughing matter. My loyal spouse — Queen Zemmn Chubshuckis is upstairs at this very moment crying her eyes out. Do you care? Oh — no big deal. Why should you care? Just fine. Just fine and dandy. It’s more important that you get glurffed on Zuzz and dance the funky norpse chicken. Well go glurf yourselves to till you puke. Then you’ll pray for The Mumulo Habjabor to make you feel better. You’ll see. Now I have to go upstairs and tend to Queen Zemmn Chubshuckis who’s poor heart is heaving with sadness over your selfish nargling.

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Koko Dozo has officially responded, through their public relations spokesman to the recent rulings of our Exalted Blessed Leader – The Mumulo Habjabor.

Greetings from Koko Dozo. We regret that we can not be present in our beloved homeland at this moment of crisis. Alas, we are serving our Exalted Blessed Leader — The Mumulo Habjabor on this tiresome errgergle called Earth. It is a hellish place, indeed and our labors fearsome and draining. But with great humility we serve a higher cause — the honor of our beloved Velfin Spoidioyz.

We are in full agreement with the recent rulings of The Exalted Blessed Mumulo Habjabor. Who are we to imagine that we have greater wisdom? We gladly share our earnings and we are quite shocked that he requests such a small sum for himself.

We beg of you to please stop these distressing protests and bring peace and order to the entire Velfin Spoidioyz. To one and all Koko Dozo bid you all Shubba Gilgabilbo!

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THE WHOLE EARTH ZHUFMALOG:
This Wild And Wacky Omposm Called Earth

by Farfummf Watafazmoo

Greetings my beloved homzoi peepz and doggies.

I have become sadly aware of the strife back in Koko Dozo’s homeland, the Velfin Spoidioyz, in reaction to our Exalted Blessed Leader — The Mumulo Habjabor’s banning of the funky norpse chicken and claiming a reasonable surcharge on sales of Koko Dozo music. As a concerned citizen of the Velfin Spoidioyz, I feel compelled to offer my own humble comments on these troubling developments. So I am offering this column as a respectful open letter to our Exalted Blessed Leader — The Mumulo Habjabor.

May the watolomps on Habjabor’s ass burn like chibmidgie in a nucular summer home. We’re on Earth now, O Blessed Shubgozz. You fatuous thuldoidy. Bring it on glurf-bucket. You can shove the vig up your fulge-cavern. We’re the Nazz around here, pal. Koko Dozo will give you 86% of our next fuld dropping. . . oh wait . . . I feel one coming on right now! Uhg. Umm. Yeah. Good god. OK, Mumsucker, your check is in the mail. Such an exalted personage art thou — your royal fulge couldn’t get past the bouncer at Burger King on this planet. That’s right — The Mumulo Habjabor is large like Lehman Brothers on this joint called Earth.

As for the funky norpse chicken — that little square dance is so yesterday that even these earthform doinkwombies are doing it. By tomorrow the entire population of the Velfin Spoidioyz will fellatiopen the window and start dancing the gupjo luzmunteen. See if your Royal Flatulence can wrap his ugly thain around those moves.

Oh snap, Mumulumps — Koko Dozo is so beyond your orbit. We’re cranked on Zuzz fumes and Mars bars and we’re untouchable, Mummy. Come and get us. We have an earthform here who they call Sarah Palin. She’ll rip your norps to shreds with her bare miglibbies. Bring it on, chickenlips!

Post-Pop Duo Koko Dozo Bring Global Funktronica To NYC

January 16th, 2009 by polarity1

New York’s Post-Pop duo Koko Dozo will be bring their unique version of ‘Global Funktronica’ to NYC’s Tubway @ Mister Black and R Bar this January. Tubway: Black To The Future, held at NoHo club/den mr. Black, has become one of the most important cultural nights in Sub-New York.

Tubway: Black To The Future
Saturday, January 24th, 10 PM
mr.Black
251 W.30th St. NYC

Tuesday January 27th, 10 PM
REBEL REBEL at R-BAR
218 Bowery, NYC
http://www.rbarnyc.com
http://www.last.fm/event/879911

Nacotheque: NYC Holiday Fiesta
Saturday, February 28th, 10 PM
FONTANA’S (in the basement)
105 Eldridge St. btwn Broome & Grand St., NYC

Saturday, March 28th, 11:45 PM
The Imperial
17 West 19th St., NYC

“This should also be an example of how to make dance music that is intelligent and cool, not dumbed down to the level of morons in too-tight $90 designer jeans.” Mark Kirby, MusicDish

Koko Dozo is a duo of legally alienated New Yorkers – Polarity/1 and Amy Douglas – who create a sound they call Global Funktronica: a unique blend of electronica, funk, club grooves, jazz and roots grooves from Brazil, Latin America and Africa. Their lyrics are hilarious, provocative, and powerful, sung in English, Spanish and Portuguese, supported by music that is truly otherworldly, rich, textural and extremely funky.

http://www.kokodozo.com
http://www.myspace.com/kokodozo

The Myth Of America Becomes America

January 13th, 2009 by polarity1

POP CULTURE IS US: It Makes Us As Smart As It Makes Us Stupid And It Gave Us Election 2008. (At Least) Three Thoughts About The Election Of Barack Obama.

by Polar Levine for Yankin’ The Food Chain, Polarity1.com

I feel pretty. I feel so cute. Cuddly-wuddly. Pristine. A baby’s butt. I feel patriotic and it feels good to feel patriotic. Not a flag in the house and I don’t care if we’re USA-Number-One or USA-Number-Ten-With-a-Bullet. I’m just proud to be an American and that’s realer than stuff.

What’s more solidly amazing than the fact that Americans voted in record numbers to elect an African-American president is that, in the end, it made no difference what his ethnic or racial background was. It was almost a mundaneity. The man was perceived as the best for the job and so he was given the job. Common sense. What’s all the fuss about?

A few years ago on a trip to São Paulo I spoke to a group of people, employing my very sloppy Portuguese, about 9/11 and how I co-founded a kids samba school in the neighborhood where the towers fell. During that trip I felt very self-conscious about being an American, realizing how rightly offensive this country had become to the rest of the world. I felt compelled to open my remarks with the disclaimer, “Não gosto de Bush” (“I don’t like Bush.”) and felt relieved by the ovation that followed. It’s odd now to feel clean because I’m an American.

The entire human race appeared to be counting on us to elect Barack Obama. The enormity of that global hunger for a singular event made the idea of a McCain victory seem like a cosmic offense against the gravitational force of human history, the result of which might plunge humanity into a psychic black hole. They wanted an Obama victory in Europe, in the Muslim world, in Africa, Latin America, Indonesia and Japan. The reign of George W. Bush created a toxic human ecology so ubiquitous, palpable and identifiable that the antidote an Obama presidency could generate was irresistible.

I don’t believe in magic but I believe the election of Barack Obama has created a rare historical moment for people to imagine the world moving toward the light and the USA will be able to lead the way. Symbolism aside (but not underestimated), more than any other American president Obama has the character, the intelligence and the bio to earn the respect and good will of the international community; an American president who has lived his life among “others” and has much of the world’s blood flowing in his own veins. That makes him far more likely to instinctively understand the needs and the cultural dynamics that give a nation its form; and that understanding will allow us to interact without the arrogance and willful ignorance that has driven our foreign policy for so long. But our renewed international power will derive from a force more powerful than the abilities of Obama, the man. America, for the first time, will lead because of the undeniable and irresistible fact that the USA is a united collective of people representing every ethnicity and nationality on earth; we live together peacefully and we are exactly what we say we are. Have a look at our brochure. Looks pretty good? And you know it’s the truth.

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http://www.polarity1.com
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